[George MacDonald Fraser] ☆ Flashman [christian-romance PDF] Read Online Ú Coward, Scoundrel, Lover And Cheat, But There Is No Better Man To Go Into The Jungle With Join Flashman In His Adventures As He Survives Fearful Ordeals And Outlandish Perils Across The Four Corners Of The WorldCan A Man Be All Bad When Harry Flashman S Adventures As The Reluctant Secret Agent In Afghanistan Lead Him To Join The Exclusive Company Of Lord Cardigan S Hussars And Play A Part In The Disastrous Retreat From Kabul, It Culminates In The Rascal S Finest And Most Dishonest Turn Meet Harry Flashman, decorated hero of the Victorian age He also happens to be a liar, a lecher, a bully, and a sniveling coward, and that is what makes these comic historical novels so funny.
He is also gloriously un PC, which seems to ruffle some dainty feathers these days Great stuff.
Harry Paget Flashman is NOT your typical morally challenged but likeable scoundrel who you can t help but love because of his sharp wit and buckets o charm No he s an ASSHOLE a big one A rapacious, lecherous, despicable scumbag with no redeeming qualities whatsoever I m talking such odious funtivities as Having sex with his Father s mistress, and then beating and sexually assaulting her when she refuses his subsequent advances Forcibly selling his Indian concubine to a passing artillery major, because she had becometoo and mopish at night to be much funRandomly flogging his household servants everydayfor their good and my own amusementGet me not the kind of actions at which it s easy to give a wink and nod I m not even docking him for his racism and sexism, for which he gets a sign of the times hall pass based on the 19th Century timeline.
And yet To the enduring credit of George MacDonald Fraser, he manages to weave a funny, engaging historical adventure around this black hole of virtue, one that kept me laughing and turning pages throughout PLOT SUMMARY Flashman follows the exploits of the notorious bully from immediately after his expulsion from Rugby School, as detailed in Tom Brown s Schooldays, from which Fraser borrowed the character The story is framed as a fictional memoir autobiography told in a series of papers discovered to have been written by Flashman when he was very old In this first installment, we follow Flashy from his schooling disgrace to his Machiavellian career in the Army, during which he travels from Scotland where he seduces the young daughter of the family he billets with , to India where he bangs everything with a pulse , to Afghanistan, where he s a participant in the major events of the First Anglo Afghan War At every turn, through a combination of luck, quick thinking and timely cowardice, Flashman comes out smelling like a rose and ends this first novel as a famous war hero THOUGHTS I liked it I feel like a bit of a heel for saying so, but Fraser s polished, wonderfully paced, historically accurate story telling, combined with Flashman s unique, humorous voice won me over It s a combination of historical fiction, scoundrel lit, and dry British humor Flashy s observations about his colleagues and the world around him are unvarnished, unflattering, and often hilarious Many of his best barbs are reserved for his commanding officer in Afghanistan, General Elphy Bey Here are a few examplesBut I still state unhesitatingly, that for pure, vacillating stupidity, for superb incompetence to command, for ignorance combined with bad judgment in short, for the true talent for catastrophe Elphy Bey stood alone Others abide our question, but Elphy outshines them all as the greatest military idiot of our own or any other day.
Only he could have permitted the First Afghan War and let it develop to such ruinous defeat It was not easy he started with a good army, a secure position, some excellent officers, a disorganised enemy, and repeated opportunities to save the situation But Elphy, with the touch of true genius, swept aside these obstacles with unerring precision, and out of order wrought complete chaos We shall not, with luck, look upon his like again.
And later, when Elphy s incompetence causes things to go from bad to worse to downright disastrous Possibly there has been a greater shambles in the history of warfare than our withdrawal from Kabul probably there has not I am at a loss for words to describe the superhuman stupidity, the truly monumental incompetence, and the bland blindness to reason of Elphy Bey and his advisers If you had taken the greatest military geniuses of the ages, placed them in command of our army, and asked them to ruin it utterly as speedily as possible, they could not I mean it seriously have done it as surely and swiftly as he did And he believed he was doing his duty The meanest sweeper in our train would have been a fitter commanderFraser s humor sits very well with me, and generally kept me smiling In the end, while I never liked Flashy, nor do I think I ever will, he did make me laugh He kept me engaged and enjoying myself, and he gets props for that I have a feeling I will be returning to the Flashman Papers to read about of Flashy s exploitsconquestsscandalscrimes and misdemeanors 3.
0 stars Recommended.

Harry Flashman anti hero extraordinaire, soldier, coward, liar, womanizer, thief , charlatan, drunkard, in one wordscoundrel joined the British Army at 17, in the service of the Queen, after being expelled from the famed Rugby School, a little intoxicated, his father Henry a wealthy widower with a mistress Judy, of the same ilk as son, isn t too concerned quite busy with his gallivanting So in 1839 as the former Princess becomes the newly crowned Queen Victoria 1837 , ruling England Flashman gets a different occupation also, ruling a saddle, enters a cavalry regiment under the legendary incompetent Lord Cardigan An unwanted duel with a very unfriendly chap occurs, yet honor must be preserved at any cost Harry is petrified and can t think of any way to skip this big honor Soon afterwards forced to marry an innocent , pretty though not bright girl, Elspeth he seduced Her relatives demand this and wanting to stay conscious agrees, lacking fortitude in his character a church wedding naturally transpires Sent not willingly to India and then Afghanistan to fight a horrific war, sounds familiar Flashman doesn t believe in or care about his greatest objective is to remain alive The British flee Kabul when the local tribes gather in the countless thousands to drive out the invaders, the luckless Harry is once again led by another incompetent General Elphinstone, disaster follows the British army as they dwindle in numbers trying to escape, unfortunately both he and the lord were historical figures, God save the Queen The exciting vicious battle in a small fort as the desperate Flashman and a few others are surrounded by angry Afghans seeking revenge for the many insults and offences they have endured from the British, foreigners are hated here owing to good reasons With swords in hand, Afghans slice anyone in their way, gore is not unknown, somehow through luck or skill survives his many adventures, Harry showing his true colors, becoming sick tired of fighting rather be with the beautiful women nearby, he will try to charm War or peace his nature doesn t vary an iota , lusting for the unattainable Wishing to be back in calm England, having pleasurable situations, will anyone disparage his sentiments Since the adept George MacDonald Fraser wrote twelve of these diverting books you can guess if our friend lives to experience other adventures and boast about them to his family an acquaintances maybe not too accurate but nevertheless quite entertainingly A sense of fun and amusement flows all through this lively tale of the unlikely protagonist or antagonist if you prefer, depending how you feel about Lieutenant Flashman he is not perfect far from it, but a realist view of soldiers An officer and a gentleman they re not, most are tough fighters doing the dirty work the politicians clamor for but keep their own clothes clean This unchanging custom continues today for better or worse.
This is the first book of the Flashman papers, much loved by many It purports to be the memoirs of a Victorian officer In this book, he serves in Afghanistan and India The cover art encapsulates the plot and tone.
A rake s adventures Harry Flashman is a self aware, shameless, shrewd, cowardly opportunist who describes himself as A scoundrel, a liar, a cheat, a thief, a coward and, oh yes, a toady Note that he doesn t mention his treatment of women He joins up fights escapes sleeps around betrays honour, friends, fellow officers, and even his country beats servants for their own good and my amusement beds women is tortured duels double crosses takes hostages is taken hostage yada yada rinse and repeat not necessarily in that order I found it a little dull after a while However, I guess this is what fans enjoy especially those who wish, perhaps against their true scruples, they could be Flash It s well written, and Flashman is a complex and believable character He feels authentic for his time and place I disapprove of him than intended, but he s disarmingly honest about his dishonesty, immorality, and other faults Although I was not charmed and beguiled very much, I was not as outraged as I thought I might have been.
The conceit of a real historic record This book claims to be Flashman s memoirs, written between 1900 and 1905, and found in 1965 Its supposed authenticity is enhanced by footnotes tying his account to real people and events, plus a glossary One of the notes even says his account clears up a longstanding historical mystery When it was published in 1969, some thought it was what it claimed despite Flashman explicitly being the same Flashman as the bully in the fictional Tom Brown s School Days George Macdonald Fraser said he wrote it as entertainment, rooted in history, not as satire He didn t disapprove of much his antihero did, and often railed against political correctness gone mad in interviews and articles Daisy chainFirst there was Flashman in Tom Brown s Schooldays, then there was the adult Flashman that Macdonald Fraser wrote But there are also two brilliant comedic caricatures from British TV.
Arnold Ace Rimmer, played by Chris Barrie, in scifi comedy Red Dwarf And Captain Flasheart, played by the late great Rik Mayall, in Blackadder Marriage, fidelity, and how gender and money lead to hypocrisyThe final chapter was rather different in tone and content, and by far the most engaging to me, though probably not to fans.
The unjustly feted hero returns home, to his devoted, pretty, naive, and wealthy wife But it turns out she is not all those things any , if indeed, she ever was Flashman is forced to confront uncomfortable truths The arch schemer has to find new ways to get what he wants I was almost only almost tempted to find out what happens next Quotes A noisy drunkard is intolerable a passive one may do at a pinch At least, if he has money money will excuse virtually any conduct in the army nowadays Some human faults are military virtues, like stupidity, and arrogance and narrow mindedness There isn t any folly a man won t contemplate if there s money or a woman at stake Always be civil to anyone who might ever be of use to me If you have money a wife need be no great encumbrance There is great pleasure in catastrophe that doesn t touch you It calls for nice judgement, this art of bragging you must be plain, but not too plain, and you must smile only rarely, letting them guess than you say is the kernel of it, and looking uncomfortable when they compliment you I managed to rape her I prefer willing women He says it s the only time he raped a woman Not imo.
An objective 3.
5 book, with 2.
5 enjoyment for me, averaging at 3.
I don t get on with audiobooks, but I can t help feeling this might work better listening to a master storyteller